Humility

Today, I caught a momentary glimpse of hope and humility. I am a being built upon a foundation of pride and resentment. That is neither natural nor right. I am in dire need of some entity that is both perfect and infinitely higher than myself. God the Father is of an incomparably higher status than I am to a cockroach. The level to which he humbled his son is utterly unfathomable. Without him I am lost. God have mercy upon me.

I'm not sure

I listened to a song that reminded me of you. Perfectly intertwined. What it felt like to be with you. The way you sent a flurry of feelings, thoughts, and cosmic beauty twirling into motion as if you had figured out the secret to harnessing life itself. I miss you.  I am reminded of the lyrics "'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all". They ring very much true to me. Better a deep set sense of loss than the disturbing veil numbness creates. Feelings are what motivate us, without them we are simply animals driveling in a sickly state of hedonism. Of course I wish that loss had never taken place, yet, we go and we do, and at the end of the day, we are always held responsible.

So here we are. You have jolted me into a state of awakened feeling. I miss you. I thank you, and I still love you. If creatures like me are still capable of such a grand endeavor. Best wishes forever.